SIMPLE SECRETS SUCCESSFUL PARENTS KNOW THAT HELP THEM AVOID THE DISCONNECTION THAT SO MANY PARENTS ARE EXPERIENCING WITH THEIR CHILDREN - PARENTS WITH YOUNG CHILDREN, GET YOUR FREE PARENT VIDEO BELOW
Suppose, as a young child, that you were mistreated by a boy down the street. The boy called you stupid. You now dwell and dwell on that remark. You get more upset as the day goes on and you start becoming distracted by violent fantasies about him. Do you see what just happened here? Those negative emotions blocked any good from coming in, and those same feelings started increasing until nothing healthy resided within. You might even picture that boy being hit by a car, while you stood by smiling. The Law of Attraction was at work again.
As a child you could have thought about the many friends you had and the kindness that they displayed with you. As those good, positive thoughts dominated your mind, you started to attract more thoughts to feel good about. This is “appreciation in action” and when you are dealing with little ones, it is important to put these kinds of ideas into a practical package for them. Little ones will demonstrate appreciation more, instead of verbalizing appreciation. So as adults, we must suggest ways that they can demonstrate these appreciation principles.
They can share more, hug more, and laugh together more. They can show appreciation in their body language. Wallace Wattles in his book, The Science of Getting Rich, states that, “The Law of Gratitude is the natural principle that action and reaction are always equal, and in opposite directions.” This is a wonderful concept to share with your children as this internalized idea will help them throughout their “tween” years and the turbulent adolescent period as well. Just knowing that their grateful thoughts alone will reward them with more to be thankful for, causing more good feelings is satisfying. And as they show their gratitude or appreciation to others, understanding the Law of Gratitude, they will feel good knowing that action will return to them also.
“To permit your mind to dwell upon the inferior is to become inferior, and to surround yourself with inferior things.” - Wallace Wattles.
As children learn gratitude through activities more than through the “practical discussions” you like to have with them, they must feel good within first. If their inner world is dark, full of insecurities, emotional neglect, low self-esteem and a low self-image, they are NOT going to connect with this idea of gratitude that sounds good to you but has NO resonance with them.
Those “practical discussions” of gratitude that you love, could have a damaging effect if you are NOT connected emotionally to your child. Remember, when you are having discussions with them, to always keep in mind how they are receiving this information of yours. If you are on the page of “how it sounds to you” and “this is good for them” kind of mindset, you can cause a disconnect and will not create the kind of connecting results you are seeking. Children learn by doing and performing activities WITH you. This increases bonding and their receptive willingness to listen to you.
Let’s say you want to teach your children about being appreciative of the basic needs that are being provided by you such as food, clothing and shelter. They will shut you out if you decide to preach to them about what you are doing or providing for them and you will see a wall being built between you and them right before your eyes. But on the other hand, if you decide to do a field trip to the homeless shelter and volunteer in their feeding program AND they see you giving the homeless on the corners some assistance, your job will be done. They will have that Gratitude seed firmly planted and they WILL act in a more grateful way. Their attitude toward those in need AND appreciation for what they have will be in order.
The mind operates on the most dominant thought, so if your dominant thought is on what is NOT working or on what people are doing to you, then you are going to receive that kind of energy, again and again. This is why it is so important to be connected to your children. When you are connected, you will know when they are feeling bad about themselves or what they are going through. You can kindly intervene and help them with positive self-talk and reassurance from you that they are loved as the wonderful person that they are internally. Many kids feel they are flawed internally. You are NOT HAVING that kind of mind-set. Got it?!
Children learn a lot from seeing you in “gratitude action.” Like this example from one of my many experiences: I was in one of my favorite healthy grocery stores in the check-out lane. The cashier asked me if I found everything that I needed. I responded with, “I most certainly did and I really appreciate the wonderful healthy choices in here. By the way, how are you doing? I see you’re doing an excellent job here.” Well, she lit up and responded with, “Well, I’m doing much better now, thank you very much.” Watch how that starts affecting your child.
Your children need to know that gratitude energy becomes infectious as it grows and grows. You start looking for more things to be grateful for. That energy is very fulfilling and you want more of it. That is one of the many things that make us real human beings – demonstrating the Law of Gratitude; giving and receiving; wanting others to feel good; giving back something of what was given to you. Too many of you are uncomfortable with that exercise because you have some kind of resistance within. It is in this resistance where healing needs to take place. Good cannot come in if it is not welcomed. Would you want to be anywhere where you were not welcomed and made to feel ill at ease?
Isn’t it time to go from angry, bullying, depressed and/or underachieving children to happy, compassionate, achieving, loving children?
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