SIMPLE SECRETS SUCCESSFUL PARENTS KNOW THAT HELP THEM AVOID THE FRUSTRATION AND FEELINGS OF FAILURE THAT SO MANY PARENTS ARE EXPERIENCING WITH THEIR CHILDREN - PARENTS WITH YOUNG CHILDREN, GET YOUR FREE PARENT VIDEO BELOW
Your children are affected by so many influences which are counter to what you are modeling in your home. Your children are inundated with messages that sanction: - Domestic violence - Societal violence - Wholesale disrespect toward everyone (women, seniors, self and all authority figures) - Illicit drug use - Criminal lifestyles - Sexual promiscuity – Racism - Non-recognition of healthy family values. Being products of their environment, children not only reflect what’s around them, they accept those influences as normal to the point of actually being their environment. Pretty scary, huh?
Many parents who have gone through and caused some pain in their lives, and they now want a different direction for themselves and their offspring. They are looking for new tools. Their old tools will only provide what they have been receiving, which is more hurt, misery, pain, failed relationships and faulty parenting styles. Now after going through methods, following models from their past, that did not give them satisfactory results, they are ready to receive new information and different parenting models. Let’s talk about your emotions and how you can manage them a little more efficiently.
Do your children “make” you so angry that you say or do things you regret later? (You know no one can “make” you angry. You CHOSE, either consciously or unconsciously, to become angry) Are you an impulsive person? Do you “fly off the handle” and they feel sorry afterwards, but you do it again? Your children come into this world completely innocent and naïve. Let’s look at how you can make other choices when your buttons are pushed. Before anger sets in, you always get a sign, so what you have to do is learn how to set up mental detour signs to redirect the oncoming negativity so your peace is not disturbed.
Your children are precious gifts from God and deserve the very best treatments, so if you have anger issues it is best if you find out how to identify the antecedents and make a conscious change THEN, before you act impulsively. You start by noticing any kind of change starting to occur: - Sweating palms - Heart rate increasing - Breathing rhythm starting to change - Hair starting to tingle - Nerves in the spine getting agitated - Jaw tightening - Fists clenching. Every thought you think and every word you speak sends messages into the universe creating energy which comes back to help you or to hurt you. So, you have to ask yourself - “What are you sending out there?”
You protect your peaceful state by being guardians over your thoughts. When a particular thought starts going astray, you are to pull it back or immediately replace it with a good and loving thought. When you analyze your faulty behavior, you start by examining the A, B, C of the situation. A stands for Antecedent; what came before; where the problem originated; B stands for the actual Behavior; what we actually witnessed, and C stands for Consequences; what happened as a result of the behavior? This naturally can be used with your children when they need to have your intervention behind their adverse behavior.
Too many times when adults intervene in escalating arguments or fighting, they don’t go far enough when they ask the youth - “What happened here and who started it?” What they get in these, sometimes, public settings where other youth are present, is a response that the trouble-making youth is comfortable in verbalizing. He or she doesn’t feel safe talking about what the real antecedent is, unless the adult knows how to ask the right questions in the right, safe environment. The perpetrator might say, “He looked at me funny.” If this was your son or daughter, you can pull them aside and get the “real deal,” away from the public and away from the attention of their peers. After the fight and you have your son by himself, you ask him, “Ok, happened?” He says, “That kid, Jerry, gave me a dirty look, so I let him have it.” You, being the wise parent, says, “Now, what is really going on with you (with the special look)? I’m talking about what is going on inside of you right now?” You want to get to the antecedent so you know how to help him. He tells you that is angry, came to school angry because he misses his father. (The son hates that his parents divorced and the biological father lives somewhere else). When you asked him how is body felt going to school, he said his heart was racing and he couldn’t concentrate in his classes. Now you know what the antecedent is; heart racing from his anger re: his father’s absence.
You will tell your son that whenever he feels his heart racing, he needs to do something right then and there before the next stage of unmanaged behavior begins. He can ask for help. He can start deep breathing exercises. He can do some physical exercises. When your son knows that he can manage his behavior, he feels empowered. You can ask him to talk about his feelings re: his father and see if something can be done to make him feel a little better. These are all antecedents that he should know and memorize: - Sweating palms - Heart rate increasing - Breathing rhythm starting to change - Hair starting to tingle - Nerves in the spine getting agitated - Jaw tightening - Fists clenching.
Every behavior has a feeling attached to it and some kind of emotional base precedes it. Your son had anger as his feeling at school, and abandonment by his father as his emotion. The main problem I have seen with parents is that they are not that motivated or interested enough in the healthy emotional development of their children to take this kind of time to ensure that their child has all the necessary tools they need to have. There are also other parents who don’t have any idea of what I am talking about and want to keep things “just the way they are.” These necessary tools will give them a balanced, developed, intelligent, emotional consciousness
Together we can transform your children from being angry, bullying, moody or too quiet to happy, compassionate, loving children. YES, and feel confident that you are using new compassionate parenting skills as opposed to how you were raised.
Parents with young children go NOW to www.cloudsofabundance.com and get your FREE Parent Video “5 Steps to Phenomenal Parenting”
Your children are affected by so many influences which are counter to what you are modeling in your home. Your children are inundated with messages that sanction: - Domestic violence - Societal violence - Wholesale disrespect toward everyone (women, seniors, self and all authority figures) - Illicit drug use - Criminal lifestyles - Sexual promiscuity – Racism - Non-recognition of healthy family values. Being products of their environment, children not only reflect what’s around them, they accept those influences as normal to the point of actually being their environment. Pretty scary, huh?
Many parents who have gone through and caused some pain in their lives, and they now want a different direction for themselves and their offspring. They are looking for new tools. Their old tools will only provide what they have been receiving, which is more hurt, misery, pain, failed relationships and faulty parenting styles. Now after going through methods, following models from their past, that did not give them satisfactory results, they are ready to receive new information and different parenting models. Let’s talk about your emotions and how you can manage them a little more efficiently.
Do your children “make” you so angry that you say or do things you regret later? (You know no one can “make” you angry. You CHOSE, either consciously or unconsciously, to become angry) Are you an impulsive person? Do you “fly off the handle” and they feel sorry afterwards, but you do it again? Your children come into this world completely innocent and naïve. Let’s look at how you can make other choices when your buttons are pushed. Before anger sets in, you always get a sign, so what you have to do is learn how to set up mental detour signs to redirect the oncoming negativity so your peace is not disturbed.
Your children are precious gifts from God and deserve the very best treatments, so if you have anger issues it is best if you find out how to identify the antecedents and make a conscious change THEN, before you act impulsively. You start by noticing any kind of change starting to occur: - Sweating palms - Heart rate increasing - Breathing rhythm starting to change - Hair starting to tingle - Nerves in the spine getting agitated - Jaw tightening - Fists clenching. Every thought you think and every word you speak sends messages into the universe creating energy which comes back to help you or to hurt you. So, you have to ask yourself - “What are you sending out there?”
You protect your peaceful state by being guardians over your thoughts. When a particular thought starts going astray, you are to pull it back or immediately replace it with a good and loving thought. When you analyze your faulty behavior, you start by examining the A, B, C of the situation. A stands for Antecedent; what came before; where the problem originated; B stands for the actual Behavior; what we actually witnessed, and C stands for Consequences; what happened as a result of the behavior? This naturally can be used with your children when they need to have your intervention behind their adverse behavior.
Too many times when adults intervene in escalating arguments or fighting, they don’t go far enough when they ask the youth - “What happened here and who started it?” What they get in these, sometimes, public settings where other youth are present, is a response that the trouble-making youth is comfortable in verbalizing. He or she doesn’t feel safe talking about what the real antecedent is, unless the adult knows how to ask the right questions in the right, safe environment. The perpetrator might say, “He looked at me funny.” If this was your son or daughter, you can pull them aside and get the “real deal,” away from the public and away from the attention of their peers. After the fight and you have your son by himself, you ask him, “Ok, happened?” He says, “That kid, Jerry, gave me a dirty look, so I let him have it.” You, being the wise parent, says, “Now, what is really going on with you (with the special look)? I’m talking about what is going on inside of you right now?” You want to get to the antecedent so you know how to help him. He tells you that is angry, came to school angry because he misses his father. (The son hates that his parents divorced and the biological father lives somewhere else). When you asked him how is body felt going to school, he said his heart was racing and he couldn’t concentrate in his classes. Now you know what the antecedent is; heart racing from his anger re: his father’s absence.
You will tell your son that whenever he feels his heart racing, he needs to do something right then and there before the next stage of unmanaged behavior begins. He can ask for help. He can start deep breathing exercises. He can do some physical exercises. When your son knows that he can manage his behavior, he feels empowered. You can ask him to talk about his feelings re: his father and see if something can be done to make him feel a little better. These are all antecedents that he should know and memorize: - Sweating palms - Heart rate increasing - Breathing rhythm starting to change - Hair starting to tingle - Nerves in the spine getting agitated - Jaw tightening - Fists clenching.
Every behavior has a feeling attached to it and some kind of emotional base precedes it. Your son had anger as his feeling at school, and abandonment by his father as his emotion. The main problem I have seen with parents is that they are not that motivated or interested enough in the healthy emotional development of their children to take this kind of time to ensure that their child has all the necessary tools they need to have. There are also other parents who don’t have any idea of what I am talking about and want to keep things “just the way they are.” These necessary tools will give them a balanced, developed, intelligent, emotional consciousness
Together we can transform your children from being angry, bullying, moody or too quiet to happy, compassionate, loving children. YES, and feel confident that you are using new compassionate parenting skills as opposed to how you were raised.
Parents with young children go NOW to www.cloudsofabundance.com and get your FREE Parent Video “5 Steps to Phenomenal Parenting”
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